When Holidays Feel Anything But Relaxing

Ah, the family holiday. The image we’re sold is all sunsets, slow dinners, and relaxed smiles. What actually happens?

Hot tempers. Loud voices. Endless snack requests. And someone inevitably ends up in tears (not always one of the children).

Allow me to set the scene: I’m in Greece, visiting family. The temperature is edging into unbearable territory, and I’m in a house full of strong, opinionated women. There are children who mimic adult behaviour with eerie precision, others who believe ice cream is the only food group, and several of us trying (and mostly failing) to keep things “relaxing.”

Don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of beautiful moments. Shared laughs. Clear water swims. Hazy sunsets. But also? Chaos. And guilt. Guilt that you’re not making the most of it. Guilt that you feel overwhelmed. Guilt that you’re not “grateful enough” for this precious family time.

The Myth of the Perfect Holiday

We put so much pressure on holidays to be restorative, bonding experiences that somehow heal every family dynamic and reset our nervous systems.

I am learning to accept: they don’t.

Especially not when the sun is melting your face, someone’s lost their shoe again (as I write, it’s apparently my turn!), and your nervous system is already fried from months of go-go-go. And now here you are, trying to “relax” in a house that feels more like a Mediterranean version of Big Brother: Family Edition.

Permission to Say “This Is a Lot”

A lesson I have learned (mostly the hard way): It’s okay if your holiday doesn’t feel like a holiday. It’s okay if you’re touched out, talked out, or teetering on the edge of losing it because someone just asked you for a fourth snack before 10am.

You can love your family and need space. You can cherish these moments and count the days until you sleep in your own bed with no one yelling “Mummy!” before sunrise.

Resetting the Holiday Mindset

So what can we do when the ideal doesn’t match the reality?

Lower the bar. No one is handing out medals for the Best Holiday Ever.

Find your 5 minutes. Whether it’s a walk, a quiet coffee, or locking yourself in the bathroom - carve out something just for you.

Laugh. It might be your only option.

Vent. (To the right person. Or the notes app.)

Remember: This version of “holiday” won’t last forever. Neither will the chaos.

Final Thought

Sometimes, the most honest thing we can say is: “This is hard.” And that’s not a sign of failure. It’s a sign you’re human.

So if your summer break feels more like a family endurance test than a soul-soothing escape, you’re not alone. And if you’re reading this hiding from your relatives behind oversized sunglasses and a freddo espresso? I see you.

Take the moments where you can. Breathe. Laugh. And know that messy, imperfect connection is part of the magic, even if it doesn’t look like the brochure.